One week after her passing, I‘d like to share some words that Heather shared with me during our last conversation in her last days.
Genesis 1:4
“God saw that the light was good, and he separated the light from the darkness.“
“I sit and stare a lot, because I'm in so much pain…
The word that I keep reflecting on is separation. The moment you die you will be separated from all the people you love. It's what keeps going through my mind. We are separated from people here, but never are we separated from God. The one constant that remains is that God never leaves us, and we are never separated from Him.”
This is a truth that you have the priviledge of knowing if you welcome God into your heart, into your life and into your death. The ultimate departure is separation.
She reflected on the line in the prayer of Saint Ignatius of Loyola. The prayer is thought to be written in the 14th century by Pope John XXII.
Soul of Christ, sanctify me
Body of Christ, save me
Blood of Christ, inebriate me
Water from the side of Christ, wash me
Passion of Christ, strengthen me
O good Jesus, hear me
Within Thy wounds hide me
Suffer me not to be separated from Thee
From the malignant enemy defend me
In the hour of my death call me
And bid me come unto Thee
That with Thy saints I may praise Thee
Forever and ever.
Amen.
She said, “It’s like in the movie, The Passion of Christ, when Christ was near the end of His life, and a single tear trails down His cheek as He dies.” When He is finally separated from those He has loved in this world, His sadness is apparent to those He leaves behind.
In this world, it's you who gets separated from God. God never leaves you. You have left Him. There is a separation from people in this world. But there is a constant connection with God.
Ephesians 4:18
“They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts.“
She said, “You don't know what's behind anybody's face, but it's what’s inside them that matters. The heart and the core matter. No matter what you've done, it's all good. It can be forgiven.
Life is not about the awards, the recognition, the stuff. It’s about the connection with others. Passing on a little bit of community in our lives, it’s good enough for me.”
(If you have known Heather in this lifetime, you know she did just that. She connected in a way that made you feel important to her. The Saturday after she had passed, I received in the mail, a package. It was from Heather. She was even reaching out and connecting with me and my daughter after she had left this earth. She wanted to gift me and Grace with something meaningful to her that she knew we would find meaningful. She gave me a bracelet with beads that were composed of wrapped-up Bible verses. She gifted Grace a carved wooden rosary beaded bracelet with a cross that she had purchased in Ireland.
That's what Heather would do. She wanted to stay connected, just like she knew she was always connected with God).
While doing some research to help her sister with details of Heather’s accomplishments as a diver for her obituary, I learned that Heather was the first female diver in UNC-Chapel Hill history to compete at NCAAs in 1990, and received All-American Honors on the platform event that year. She was an essential competitor in 1991 at ACCs when the Women’s Swimming and Diving team won the Team Title.
She won the 3-meter diving board event at the ACC Championship Swimming and Diving meet in 1992. This accomplishment was not highlighted, nor recorded under the diving events for ACCs in the meet results, nor the recap for UNC’s Swimming and Diving history. Although her winning this event, was again essential for the entire UNC Women’s Swimming and Diving Team to be honored as ACC Champions that year. She was also named the ACC Diver of the Meet that year as well.
She competed on the U.S. Outdoor National Diving team, competing in several countries overseas. She trained in Michigan at the time. This is a time remembered by many of her friends, as a time when she was so completely happy while training and competing for her country in the sport she loved. She brought back many gifts from her travels and shared them with her loved ones. She always wanting to connect her love of sport and share her gift and talent with those she loved and honored.
In 2011, she was inducted into the Circle of Champions at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, which was a form of Hall of Fame for Swimming and Diving at the University. She invited me as her guest, because I was left off the list of those invited or being inducted into this Circle of Champions. Heather acknowledged that I was an essential component and reason for some of our other teammates, who received an invitation, to be inducted into the Circle of Champions that evening. She made it a point to include me.
She told me, “I love that Grace is fighting for women to be able to compete on a level playing field. I love that she is standing up against transgenders being able to compete with women. I love that she will call a spade a spade. If we don't fight for this, what did our grandmothers fight for in the first place.”
She also said in Heather fashion, “It'd be funny if I could prank you.” She was always up for a good laugh. Even when she was dying, she turned her situation into comedy. She made many of us laugh while her frail body withered away.
Heather’s last words she wanted captured were as follows:
Heather
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